Nagging and preaching to kids almost never works because most teenagers naturally want to rebel. Just look at the data on kids who were in the DARE program - studies showed that they not only didn't use fewer drugs, some showed they used more. The kids respond positively to this program when they are younger but when they hit the rebellious stage many naturally turn to the very things the adults have been preaching to them about - food, tobacco, alcohol, drugs, sex, etc. It is deep in human nature to be enticed by forbidden fruit - just ask Adam and Eve. (Seriously, there is a reason this story has resonated for millenia.)

The time to address kids' eating habits is when they are young. After all, parents control most of what young kids eat. Parents should serve a variety of healthy, tasty food, rather than catering to their whims. And it is very important that kids see their parents doing this themselves and enjoying healthy food, something that is often not the case. I clearly remember my own parents getting really excited when produce like corn, strawberries and tomatoes were in season.

Reverse psychology can also be a powerful tood. For example, if you are eating something more exotic like sushi try telling your child that this is grown-up food and that you aren't sure he or she would like it. Seeing food as cool is a powerful motivator. Just yesterday I was talking with two moms whose teenage daughters had always been picky eaters (who had been catered to). They were astounded that both girls love sushi. Another mom said it didn't surprise her at all because teenagers are very influenced by what is cool and trendy.

While I agree it is important to talk to kids about what they are eating, I strongly believe it should mostly be in terms of positives, not negatives. Casually pointing out that a certain food makes you stronger, healthier, etc. is more effective than harping on the negatives . But focusing too much on food in any way can be a mistake.

As a mother of grown kids I have seen a lot of problems in families who made food a big issue or who catered to kids narrow demands. One of my daughter's friends actually stopped eating in early elementary school and had to be treated for anorexia because she had heard her father nag her mom about gaining weight. (Mom wasn't even fat.) The only friend I had growing up who had food issues also had a mother who was constantly dieting.

Amen, sister! My mother always reminded my two sisters and me of our weight when she felt we weren't "slim" - and she commented when we were too slim. She cared about appearances, obviously, but also about health and about eating properly. I'm glad she did it. It has certainly helped me withstand the onslaught of Lunchables, something I've held out against quite easily.

I liked the intent of the article. But you lost me when you chose to implement the "France does it better than us" mode of argument. We are a huge country, several times the size of France in population and land mass. We have more fat people than France has people. Likewise, we have more fit people than France has people. Saying that the entire United States, to include all of its unique regions and cultures, should have a uniform diet and eating habits is like saying that all of Europe should have a uniform diet and eating habits. Eating healthy is an individual responsiblity and not doing so is not the fault of some secret chamber of food executives.

It can be done, even with boys.

When my son was very young I made sure that if he was watching commercial TV, I was there in the room to discuss the food commercials. From an early age, he understood that kids breakfast cereal was better as a dessert than a meal. I bought it for him once, as a dessert, and he didn't finish the box because he preferred our homemade treats.

We discussed all the commercials marketed to him, food, toys, McDonald's, and he has learned to be a realistic user of media and knows when he is being hoodwinked by glamorous ads.

At 17, and at boarding school, I know he is still making healthy eating choices because he is trim, against all genetic odds.

A fascinating article, but somewhat out of touch with the times. How do you ensure that your kids eat heatlhy when fruit and vegetables are so much more expensive and less filling than starches and processed foods?

Teaching your children healthy eating habits is one of many conversations we should be having - and we must live it just as consistently as we hope for them.

However - I am disappointed at how one sided this article is. Parents ignore bad eating, yes, but they also ignore undereating. Two beautiful, smart, previously athletic sisters that I know are now wasting away at 16 and 18. Their mother has picked at food her whole life, getting constantly thinner, and has publicly cringed as they ate anything. She started early worrying that their thighs were 'large' like hers (they weren't) and that they would stop one activity and lose their motivation for a 'healthy' life - both girls are in desperate need of counseling and cannot even see how thin they are now.

Emphasis on healthy choices, getting nutrients and substance in food, and being a good example are important. Avoiding lunchables is smart. But this article wholly ignores the harm of nagging... and the fact that malnourished poor eating has two ends of the spectrum.

A small blow to strike against the Lunchables abomination - I've just discovered "GoPicnic" meals. Inexpensive box meals that require no refrigeration, made with primarily organic, trans-fat free, natural and healthy foods. They even have gluten-free and kosher meals. There are grownup meals, but the kids meals are a godsend. My son loves them and his classmates all envy him. They just started selling them direct to consumers on their website, gopicnic.com. Try them and declare yourself free from Lunchables!

MarineLtCol, you do have an interesting point. I used to feel the same way and did some research on the subject, though, and if you do actually take a tour of all of Europe you're not going to see as many fat people as you do here...our portions are out of control, b/c there is a food surplus in this country and it is someone's job to get us to eat all of that food. Not only that, but since no one eats locally grown food, they are injected with additives and sodium for preservation, and then "enriched" which actually is harder for the body to break down...your body literally doesn't know what to do with it...so it turns it into fat...that's why you see so much more cellulite in America, too.
Sure, the people who work for these companies aren't evil...but they do have vested interests, and friends with vested interests at keeping a very big business on the top of the food chain...and I guarantee you that if we all started watching our portions and using foods that actually satisfy you after a small portion we'd all be slimmer. In France, Italy, and Austria just to name a few countries, their food is packed with calories...but much of it is natural...like real butter and locally grown products...so it's not really like eating a cupcake out of a box where you're not satisfied unitl you have like five.

My attitude now is that "fat is a capitalist issue." That is, American kids are under attack from a corporate food culture so powerful and toxic that parents should be combating it as ferociously as we would pesticide contamination or the return of Polio.

A very interesting observation... Although selling convenient, processed food is profit-driven on the surface, a more sinister cultural phenomenon is also at work. The health risks of obesity are overshadowed by a desire to be sociable and attractive, a common theme in convenience food advertising regardless of the absurdity of the claim. What is subtly at work here permeates the marketing industry- the sexualization of every commodity. There are strong links between eating disorders and childhood sexual abuse as well. Perhaps this is how "capitalism" has exploited us most subtly?

Good article, but what's with all the gramatical errors?

The whole thing about mothers and daughters and food is not about weight. It is about control.

The only hope you have to eliminate disordered eating in your children is to eliminate disordered eating in yourself. It's not fair to insist on moderation for your children when you yourself are on a binge/starve cycle, or constantly picking apart your appearance, or allowing your husband/spouse/so to critique the women he sees on TV. Perhaps its not the children who need the discipline.

I just never understood how my mother thought that her telling me to 'put down the breadstick' at the restaurant was a more effective means of weightloss than every time I look in the mirror or turn on the TV. Maybe she caught me too late. Really it just made me feel like shit and I'm still fat.

The bottom line is, I don't over-eat from stress or emotional issues. I eat because food tastes really really good.

Rdschenkel:

You can't even spell "grammatical"!!!!

Children need to learn to eat when hungry and to eat a variety of foods. Labeling foods as "bad" can lead to eating disorders, especially in perfectionistic girls. Of course it makes sense to prepare healthy meals for your children to eat, to have plenty of fruits and vegetables available, and to model healthy eating and lifestyle habits. Surely the occasional Lunchable or Oreo is no big deal. Give me a break.